I need some detachment

I called my mom back last night while my husband gave my daughter a bath. I should have been doing the dishes, but I figured the dishes could wait. My mom updated me that she has been talking to a friend of mine, who is sometimes helpful and sometimes not. She also told me that she has been babysitting my brother's son and (ex)step-children. She promised she'd be home on Saturday, Halloween, just in case any grandchildren stopped by for trick or treating. She got lots of candy.

So a combination of guilt and bribery on her part I guess. I'm not even sure if we'll be able to get my daughter to put her Halloween costume on since I think she has changed her mind about being a princess. We also have decided where we want to go trick or treating, or when etc.

I think we've settled that we'll be having dinner with my dad on Sunday night, without my mother of course, but I'm still waiting to get a time and place confirmed.

I also got some disappointing news on my job today. I really wanted to quit my job, but I held on, bit my lips, grinded my teeth, and made it through the day. Walking out and quitting would have been selfish of me, kind of like suicide. So I held on. Not an easy thing to do, and I'm still bitter.

So now I need to Let Go and Let God again. Really, I am still waiting on my job stuff. The Governor announced today that he is expecting layoffs and furloughs and if I don't get either of those, then I should consider myself lucky. As far as my mom goes, that will be in the hands of my daughter I think. I can't force a preschooler to do much of anything these days so I will just have to wait and see what happens. I'm powerless and I just have to Let Go and Let God.

I had hoped to be in a better place today, I had hoped... but that gets me no where. It is what it is. Right now it's almost 5pm and time to go.