I said something yesterday, quoted it actually, and I'm going to repeat it here:
"Our actual parent is a Higher Power whom some of us choose to call God. Although we had alcoholic or dysfunctional parents, our Higher Power gave us the Twelve Steps of Recovery."
http://www.adultchildren.org/
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Now I've been meditating on this a bit. We are all God's children, or children of the universe, or however we choose to define it. I have heard often the expression "Anyone can be a father, it takes someone special to be a dad!" But we don't seem to have an equivalent for mothers, do we? I haven't heard it.
So this person who gave birth to me, and who has abused me for nearly 40 years is my biological mother. I have never had a "step-mother", although I've wanted one. She is the only "mother" I've known. However if I remember that we are all "God's children" then maybe that will help me to detach, to let go of that fear of abandonment.
okay, that's it. Just a quick one for now.
The fear of abandonment is a tough one. I have that same fear. But I realize today that the past doesn't have to define who I am anymore. There are other ways for me to face these fears thanks to Al-Anon.
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